Life's Too Short: I Free Myself From Offense

Dear Readers-

I. didn't. even. know. this. was. a. thing

but, it totally is- offense.

Did you know you have to CHOOSE to be offended?

Even if you can verbalize  something is wrong, strange, different, mean, rude, unkind, etc... and know it in your heart- 

that. it. is. just. unfair....it's still just a choice.

I really didn't know that- at all- but it's been pretty life changing for me the last couple of weeks.

I was taking a church bible study on Wednesday nights and we were talking about conflict resolution.  Well, we had been going to marriage counseling months before and we have a lot of changes at work- so I was all ears.  I realized two things:  (1)  offense is a real thing that you can actually control in your heart and (2) reconciliation (forgiveness over and over again)  is impossible if you live in past offenses.

Boom. mic drop.

This was too real for me because I had been trying over and over again to make changes with my husband at home and between us that seemed to never work out as planned.  We have a lot of new things are work and it's still in the growing phases.  So, every time we move in a direction for one thing, some thing else needs adjustments.  Regardless, home and work, have been constant stressors.  

I. felt. offended. all. the. time. in. my. heart.

However, in my mind, I knew change wasn't going to work out overnight.

So, I couldn't figure out what was so wrong with my heart.

Well, it's because of offense.

I justified my offenses and it hardened my heart.

I banked those offenses and stacked them up.

There was no room for forgiveness.

I. didn't. want. to. be. hurt. anymore.

That was the bottom line.

But, now, I know that's the wrong way to approach it.

More and more each day I am fully aware that we live in an imperfect world full. of. hurting. people.

Hurt people hurt people.

BUT, I also believe that I don't think they chose to be  hurt in the first place either.

If you see offense as a choice, you can make the choice for others to not carry on the hurt.

If we are honest, nobody wants it.  Everyone has been hurt enough. 

Personally, I think I let offense have too much weight and power in my life and I can really no longer let it rule the trajectory of my life. 

I have felt so much freer the last couple of weeks and I make the choice daily to be honest and kind- but leave not offended.

I even finished the preface and chapter 1 of my book the last two weeks.

I have a new dream of being an instructional coach in my future.

My husband and I are more gracious with each other and forgiving daily.

I give in less to offense at work with the constant change.

Praise. the. GOOD. Lord!

I'm very grateful.

Love. Always,

Crystal